Taking a Me Day

Table for one, please!

Some days we just need time to ourselves.  Whether single and sexy or settled down and in love, I have learned that it is so healthy and quite fun to just sneak in some “me time.”  I’ll be honest, I am an intimate person who enjoys company with those I trust, but I do love having my own space.  It wasn’t always an easy thing to embrace.  But after watching enough chick flicks and coming out from the other side of crappy relationships, I had an epiphany and discovered my own scene in the movie where the girl gets her mojo back!  I truly enjoy time to myself and encourage you to discover what that means for you.  Are you biting your lip in curiosity?  Don’t worry, I got you!

Things to do on your “Me Day.”

Take yourself shopping.

Shopping is always a good idea.  Window or for real is fine, just own where you are and be financially responsible.  Something about the shoe aisle is so therapeutic for me.  Try slipping your feet in a pair of heels that ignite something on the inside of you.  If they fit and cause you to twirl in the mirror, I’m pretty sure you have selected a winning pair.

Netflix and really chill.

Binging on a good series is so satisfying.  If you don’t have a short attention span like myself, you can line up a few movies and set up a snack tray with some of your favorites.  I’m always down for an ice-cold coca-cola and butter popcorn.  Just remember to keep the remote within arm’s reach.  Somehow, I never follow through with this and regret it later.

Sleep.

You’d be surprised how amazing you feel when you wake up.  If you know that you are working hard and sometimes fall short of stressing over the craziness of life, go to bed.  You deserve it.  You can put on pretty lingerie or just throw on an oversized t-shirt (my personal favorite) and knock out.  Be comfortable.  No makeup allowed and a messy bun is a must.

Get your nails done.

There’s really nothing like a fresh mani and pedi.  I always have to get my signature coffin nails in a pretty nude color.  Simplicity goes a long way.

Relax.

There really is no right or wrong way to go about this.  Personally, a bubble bath with candles is a cure-all for me.  Consider playing soothing music in the background and reading your favorite book or magazine.  I have Essence and Women’s Health magazines on standby at all times.  If you don’t feel like getting your hair wet, opt for cozying up on the couch with your laptop and get lost on Pinterest.  Ultimately, you know what relaxes you, just do that and enjoy time to yourself.

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How to Adult

What 29 has taught me.

Sigh, life can be crazy!  But the amazing thing is that a woman has everything she needs within to get through.  Her mind, her vision, her discipline, her intuition, and her God,  (not in that order, I might add! ) are all she needs.  There comes a point where you need to get an epiphany that time is ticking and you deserve to live a life, not necessarily perfect, but one that you love.  That is my active goal.  I am tired of identifying with the opening scene in Bad Moms, coffee spilling on my face, always rushing, looking cute but my personal hashtag reads: Murphy’s Law.  While it is pretty funny, it is so not cute.  To be honest, being a believer doesn’t make you exempt from the craziness.  This is not about religion y’all, it is about a relationship with God and yourself.  It’s time to crack the whip.

Identify who you are.

If you don’t, someone else will.  This may or may not turn out well.  Who are you?  Do you know why you were born?  Do you know your purpose?  Do you know your gifts? How about your talents and skills?  What makes you laugh?  What pisses you off?  What makes you, you?  I’ll be honest, these aren’t always the easiest questions to answer when you have lived a good chunk of your life pleasing others or chasing their dreams and expectations of you.  Trust me, I know this all too well.  Take it from someone who used to live afraid of stepping into their own.  You’ll reach a breaking point.  I certainly did.  It usually comes around the time when you start to feel unfulfilled, controlled, compromised, frustrated, and empty.  So, you can wait until you’re literally burnt out or switch up the pace now.  I highly recommend the second option.  Believe it or not, when you start to own who you really are, people will begin to respect you for it.  And for those that don’t, who cares?  At least you are happy, right?  Choose you.

Set goals.

If you are still not bringing a dish to the holiday parties, girl.  It is time to get in that kitchen and get your culinary skills on.  What would you love to learn how to make?  What is it that you want to accomplish?  Let’s think beyond the kitchen.  Consider financial, health, social, spiritual, and educational goals.  While I am a huge fan of vision boards, it takes a bit more than envisioning what you want.  It certainly is the first step, but you actually have to set benchmarks and give yourself a reasonable deadline to take action steps towards your vision.  Break it down.  Take it from someone with extensive case management experience, I know a little something something, even if I had to learn it the hard way.

Get organized.

Don’t think life is going to make it easy for you to accomplish your goals, you have to get things in order.  If you are someone who goes all in, like myself, you’ll soon learn that you have to space things out.  Set aside time to take care of household needs, to go to the grocery store, to cook dinner, pay bills, actually get a good night of sleep, and to do something fun once in a while.  It’s all about balance.  Planners work well for some.  If you can identify with battling perfectionism or have little OCD tendencies, then opt out for getting into a healthy routine, not schedule.  You have to find something that works for you, that allows you to hold yourself accountable while allowing room for flexibility when life hits you unexpectedly.  Life is life.  It will not always be perfect, but if you are intentional about accomplishing your goals and taking care of responsibilities, you’ll be good.

Confession.

Battling ongoing migraines, waking up to rush out the door, feeling drained, driving through fast food drive-throughs religiously, ordering door dash with a messy bun, feeling depressed, and working to just pay bills became exhausting.  I didn’t like it.  Not to mention, that gut was developing quickly and envisioning a flat tummy inspired by pinned inspirations on Pinterest was not doing it for me.  If you are there, it takes one decision.  Change your life today.  Sometimes we can be deceived into believing that we are waiting on God, when in all actuality, he is waiting on us.  So pick yourself up, fix your face, hop in the shower, put on a cute outfit,  eat a yummy breakfast (that you cooked), and tackle life with a planner in one hand and your bible in the other.  Be intentional.

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The Perfect Everyday Lip

Obsessed With Neutrals Much?

It’s only obvious a nude lip can go a long way.  With so many options, it can be beautifully complex, leaving room for your personality to still shine through.  Have you ever considered this?  I love all shades of nude and depending on the undertone, I am a fan of practically every single one.

In case you thought nude only reflected those shades of beige, think again.  Depending on your mood, you can go for a peachy nude, a pink nude, or even a purple nude.  Yes, these all exist.  While I may be a little biased on brands because I absolutely love MAC Cosmetics for anything lipstick related, you can dabble with a drugstore or high-end brand of your choice.  The reason I love MAC Cosmetics lipsticks so much is because they have always been long-lasting for me.  Not to mention, I rarely have to apply additional coats throughout the day once it has been applied on.  So in essence, I am saving money in my mind.  Do what works for you.  Below are a few of my favorite nude lipsticks by MAC Cosmetics.

Really Me

Peachstock

Honey Love

Alternatives

If you aren’t a fan of lipsticks, let alone matte lipsticks, you can opt for a gorgeous lip gloss, which is perfect year round.  But who doesn’t like to shine a little more with a glowy look in the summertime? Personally, I like lipgloss year-round, especially in the winter months when I’m feeling J-Lo’s “All I Have” music video vibes from back in the day.  Shout out to all of the 80s babies and 90s kids.

On the other hand, you also have the option of liquid lipsticks as well.  If you are a pro, kudos to you because I struggle with applying these.  Once they dry, it’s a wrap.  Either way, you can never go wrong with a nude lip.  It’s perfect for any occasion.  With so many options, you are sure to find a shade that works for you.  What is your favorite nude lipstick or gloss?

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Start Living

Press play.

Life was never meant to be something that passes you by.  What are you doing with it?  Are you spending more time reminiscing on what used to be as if you are hopeless and have nothing to look forward to?  Get your thumb off of the rewind button and press play.  Each day and moment is an opportunity to make progressive steps on the path that was created for you.  You would never know this if you haven’t grasped the understanding of destiny and come to realize that your life has a purpose and has been entrusted to you for a reason.  Do you even know what it is?  Have you ever given yourself the opportunity to discover it?

Put on your big girl panties.

Not the ones that were picked out for you when you were 5, but the ones you were drawn to buy when you became of age.  If you haven’t noticed already,  there is always an internal attraction to different things, ideas, and concepts that spark your interest, based on how you were wired.  The key to discovering your purpose is to follow that inner voice found within.  Each time you listen, you are accompanied by the internal peace that gives you the assurance that you are headed in the right direction.  It is no longer about others or popular opinion, it is about you taking action and making the best decisions for you, without compromise.  Your time, energy, and money are all valuable.  So stop handing them over to someone else to manage and start using them in a way that is conducive for the life that you deserve to live.

Own who you are.

To own who you are is to know who you are.  It is simple.  It is found in the word of God and actually taking the time to get to know yourself.  Make use for the unique interests and talents that you have.  Learn what you like and what you dislike.  Above all,  don’t be afraid to switch gears, if needed.  I’ve had to!  From quitting a dead end job and going after a worthy career, to throwing out an ashy shade of foundation and purchasing my beautiful shade, you name it.  If you are looking for any inclination that you are moving in the right direction for your life, do an inventory check-in.   Ask yourself the same question that playas ask the ladies, Is you happy?”   If the people or activities that you are invested in are not bringing you a return or adding any value, then they are serving as a distraction.  Love yourself enough to start living again.  It will totally be worth it.

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